Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Flu Season

In this most dreaded of all seasons, when plagues abound and roam freely over the icy plains, health is in danger. While friend after friend may succumb to the chill grip of icky-sicky bugs, I remain standing.

So, I'm here to share my health advice!


COOKIEBONECRUSHER IS PROUD TO PRESENT...

HOW NOT TO GET SICK

1) Eat Flinestones vitamin like they are candy. They wouldn't taste so good if you weren't supposed to eat a ton!

2) Rile up strangers on the internet by anonymously posting inflammatory comments. Not only is it good for the soul, but the positive rush it will give you encourages the growth of MEGA-CELL, which is the cell that not only kicks all sorts of illness and disease out, but also is known to show up in comic book characters to enable fast healing and lots of fighting.

3) Eat plenty of red meat. You get double points if you do this in front of vegetarians/vegans.

4) Sleep in class. Everyone knows that sleep counts double if it is daylight, and professors wouldn't have such soothing lullaby voices if they didn't want for you to nap.

5) If you start to get a little sick, tell yourself that A ZOMBIE OUTBREAK IS HAPPENING! Then, out of desire not to become a member of the shambling, decaying undead, your body will naturally force any illness out. It's a scientifically documented instinctive reaction.

Yes, these are why I enjoy perfect health!


On a side note, looks like my comic strip won't run in the paper this week :-(
Too many real articles; no space for it.

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